Bully; Arrogant; Loser; Taker Narcissist; Bi-polar; Victim, Addict “Middle-class”; “Working-class”; “Posh” *&%@! (Offensive words based on race, ethnicity, religion, sexuality and gender) “Terrorist Sympathiser”; “Terrorist” . . . They are all labels; used disparagingly, and frequently, in all areas life. They stigmatise, exclude, polarise, pigeonhole and stereotype. Labels exist, and will continue to exist – […]
It is said that no one else is responsible for how we interpret a situation and the feelings this raises in us. One type of response in these situations may be “This is your stuff”, or, if I’m owning it, I may say: ‘This is my stuff’. In other words, this is a projection, or […]
I’ve been reading Arnold Mindell’s book “The Deep Democracy of Open Forums” and in it he mentions that clapping can be used to support one speaker in favour of another – a ‘point-scoring’ system if you like. So I started thinking about ‘clapping’ – as you do…! As a society we regard clapping to be an […]
“I do not see life as it is, I see life as I am” Byron Katie When our wounds and fears determine our perspectives, and our perceptions perpetuate our wounds, we are caught in a vicious cycle. This cycle escalates conflict, both within us and with others. One’s thinking and feeling-filters determine how we […]
“Forgiveness does not change the past but it does enlarge the future” Paul Boese Forgiveness means letting go of resentment and retaliation by recognizing that perpetuating the conflict only hurts us more. While an authentic apology can be effective in restoring interpersonal relations, forgiveness goes one step further; it enables healing and allows each person […]
Self-esteem is a determining factor in all communication, as core personal beliefs can come into play with or without our conscious knowledge. When they do, we may feel like we’ve lost our ‘centre’ and be quick to react to what is happening. These beliefs are assumptions we have made about ourselves, others and life in general […]
THE BLAME-GAME: why and how it happens, its impact on our self-esteem and how to disengage. When things go wrong at work, with someone in the service industry, socially or at home, we engage in a blame-game to defend our shaken self-esteem. As our instinctual reaction to defend ourselves kicks in, we remain locked in […]
