December 12, 2015
Picture: Don Miguel Ruiz “The Four Agreements” It’s not always easy to be full of festive cheer when tense feelings lurk beneath the Christmas tree. Family gatherings can trigger old dynamics and emotions even when we feel we’ve personally resolved them. By responding differently, we can break patterns and turn a problem into an opportunity for understanding […]
Read more...
December 12, 2015
Bully; Arrogant; Loser; Taker Narcissist; Bi-polar; Victim, Addict “Middle-class”; “Working-class”; “Posh” *&%@! (Offensive words based on race, ethnicity, religion, sexuality and gender) “Terrorist Sympathiser”; “Terrorist” . . . They are all labels; used disparagingly, and frequently, in all areas life. They stigmatise, exclude, polarise, pigeonhole and stereotype. Labels exist, and will continue to exist – […]
Read more...
November 11, 2015
Is resentment holding you back? What can you do to change the situation in a constructive and empowering way? Years ago, when I was adapting to the nuances of the English language, I asked a friend “Do you say: “to bear a grudge or ‘to bear grudge’?” (i.e. without the ‘a’) His answer: “It depends […]
Read more...
August 08, 2015
Most of us are familiar with guilt; be it through a feeling of wrongdoing, or as a driver for something we ‘ought’ to do. When either of these experiences takes hold the result is a cocktail of resentment, blame and power struggles. If our reaction is to: attack, or rescue and placate, or take […]
Read more...
June 06, 2015
The other day flying back from a trip I overheard two interesting arguments that got stuck in blame with no understanding for either side. We had been waiting at the gate at the appointed boarding time for over half an hour with no announcements and no signs of life from ground staff. Frustration and anxiety […]
Read more...
June 06, 2015
Change: love it, hate it, want it, resist it; want it on our terms, at our pace . . . We all react differently, and our own reactions will vary depending on the circumstances, mood and people we’re interacting with. When we’re triggered, our communication style can become defensive, whether in a passive, passive-aggressive or […]
Read more...
December 12, 2014
Don Miguel Ruiz “The Four Agreements.” It’s not always easy to be full of festive cheer when tense feelings lurk beneath the Christmas tree. Family gatherings can trigger old dynamics and emotions, even when we feel we’ve personally resolved them. By responding differently, we can break patterns and turn a problem into an opportunity for understanding and […]
Read more...
October 10, 2014
Sometimes when I say that I teach conflict resolution the response is a quizzical look as the person waits for me to explain. Or perhaps they’re just looking at me funny and I still haven’t got the hint! So what does conflict resolution (CR) actually mean? And what effective tools does it provide for interpersonal […]
Read more...
August 08, 2014
Like many I have been hugely saddened and horrified by events in Gaza. Throughout my reading and debates, on and off social sites, I noticed that there are three strands of opinions and information being shared. One supports and exacerbates the polarization of views and uses incendiary language and generalizations. Another seeks to breakdown those […]
Read more...
July 07, 2014
Workplace environments are not always as inclusive as we would like them to be, and one or more of us may feel that we don’t quite fit in, or agree with the status quo. Consequently silence may feel like the easiest and safest option if there are fears of social or professional reprisal for voicing […]
Read more...